This is one of the many reasons that I love Sara Bareilles. She's amazing. She totally plays to her crowd, but has an amazing unteachable talent. Everytime I see her live videos I'm insanely impressed. My next wish is to see her LIVE!!!! This is a funny video... she was playing at a concert and her song is usually pretty mellow but they started fist pumping to it so she did a little bit of a tweak to enhance it. Enjoy!

So internet, today I just finally solved one of the mysteries of life. What is the answer to that million dollar question? Ok come closer, listen carefully --- I just told a guy I wasn't interested in him when he asked me out, and he thanked me for being honest and treated me nicely afterward.

WHAT?!!!?!?

I think I just peed my pants with glee.

Here I thought that you had to let guys down gently, meaning make up excuses until they get the point. I do not say any of this with any arrogance, I have been dumped as much as I've dumped. I have been rejected and know how that feels. I am simply trying to say... I solved a problem I usually create.

I have always known guys say they want honesty, but every time I tried it in the past it ended horribly, which then scared me from trying the honest route ever again. I only previously tried it twice because one guy couldn't handle it, cried his eyes out and told me I was a horrible evil-spirited person which made me feel like the devil and I almost went out with him again because of my guilt. The second proceeded to tell himself I was kidding, and called me everyday for 3 weeks until my friend finally got on the phone and told him I was NOT interested and my 3 weeks of ignored calls should not be mistaken for playing hard to get, they are specifically a loud and clear signal to BACK OFF. Both of these however happened after date one. I had circumstantial evidence showing me why they weren't the guys for me, I wasn't just assuming.

Anyway, back to the current matter. I told him he seemed nice but I was interested in someone else and that I didn't think we should go out. My brain feels scrambled almost. Like this is some amazing never before heard of concept that I have just discovered... HONESTY? You can tell them you're not interested and it won't hurt their feelings? Wow! I think I just saved a couple weeks of dodging phone calls and making up gentle lies. Now that energy can be put to good use, like my never ending homework because I decided to graduate right now.

I think the really great thing is, I saved him a lot of time too and actually may have caused way less damage. He no longer has to wonder about me at all, and now he cannot put me in the category that all girls who make up excuses get put into. Now if I could just learn to do that BEFORE they get my phone number. I still have a hard time saying no to phone number requests when I'm not interested. It's scary looking them in the face and saying "No I'm sorry, I don't want to give it to you, but thank you for the compliment of asking."

Baby Steps.

P.S. Any guy opinions on this will be welcome. I may disagree, but go for it anyway. And please, if at all possible, spare the "you're satan" comments. You still have my permission to think them. :)

This is what happens when I take my crappy digital camera that is currently held together by a rubber band, is running out of batteries so I have to keep turning it off and waiting for some juice to come back, to Utah Lake on a sunny afternoon and use my self timer. (Oh yeah, and I tweaked some of the photos too...). I'm pretty happy with what I got.


It was such a beautiful day, I'm sad that one day soon I'll be employed again looking out the window sadly wishing I was out there basking in the beautiful sunshine. I guess I should be thankful I'm not employed right now instead of complaining then huh?

Well, for those of you who don't know, I made it!!! Here's a bunch of pictures from the day. It was so much fun! While the festivities kinda dragged on, it was so awesome to be sitting at my graduation. I know it took me forever. I have had 5 majors, a one year hiatus, and many part time semesters due to lack of funding! All this is ending just as I'm turning 25. It was so much fun though. I was surprised that I had feelings the whole day that I would miss my college life. (Lucky for me I still have to take a couple classes until June so I am not missing it quite yet!) I don't know why I'll miss the constant stress, having to be in 5 places at once, missing my cash flow, missing years of sleep, and sitting in those hard chairs with a desk attached.


I just want to say a quick thank you to my family. My mom, stepdad Sam, and my dad all helped me through college, they paid for my Associate's and helped me whenever I ran into roadblocks. They also spent countless hours on the phone with me helping me grow up! Also a thank you to my Grandparents, and anyone else who has been there and helped me! I love ALL of you. I'm so lucky to have such wonderful and supportive family and friends.