This place was beautiful. So quiet, lovely, lush and green. It was a little rainy, but I could've stayed here all day and enjoyed the quiet atmosphere. I took a lot of photos, and short videos of the quiet tranquility. I hope they do it some justice... although they really don't. You just need to go. I'm so glad we made time for this place during our trip to Portland.

Restaurant in Portland.

Justin and I decided to celebrate our 1st anniversary vacation-style. We went back and forth between Redwood National Forest on the coast of California, or Portland. We aren't really sure what drew us both toward Portland, but it ultimately won. Maybe it's that we both randomly said it seemed cool to live in Portland several months ago. Maybe it's that to get to the coastal redwoods it was a 14 hour drive and Portland was only about 10 or 11. Either way, Portland won our vote and we booked a cute little one bedroom apartment off airbnb.com. The ride there was long but very fun, and we couldn't wait to get there. Driving into Portland is really neat. The first several hours are just flat and open land, but then you drop into the Columbia River Gorge and you're in a lush green forest. Everywhere we looked it seemed like ivy, fern, moss, flowers and other greenery were spewing out with reckless abandon. We explored the city, ate some great food, went to a massive bookstore (one of our favorite pastimes), and just had a great trip.

I LOVED IT.

Here are pictures of one of my favorite places that we went. This is Multnomah Falls, just outside Portland.  This place isn't done any justice by the photos. It was a beautiful 60-70 degrees, there was mist in the air from the falls, and every plant was a very vivid green. We also were able to take a short hike through the area nearby and enjoy the cool, crisp air the mountains provided. Justin isn't in a lot of the pictures because he is a typical guy and hates getting his picture taken.

The next post, which you'll see in a day or two, is of the Portland Japanese Garden in Forest Park in the middle of the city, my other favorite place we went. It was rainy that day, but it provided a really nice overcast, peaceful feel in the garden. I just didn't want to overwhelm you all with photos, so check back on Saturday and you should be able to see those ones too.

I've spent the past year in a kind of fog. Shortly after I got married and had a blast on a cruise to the tropics, something was a little off with me. First it started with a few random instances of acute nausea for 5 minutes here and there. People at work teasing me that I was pregnant with my honeymoon baby. (Insert shrill scream. SO NOT READY FOR A KID.) Then I started regularly having problems with my stomach. I thought maybe my anxiety was back, but I didn't feel anxious, only my stomach issues were present. I went through a lot of ideas before I went to my doctor. I asked her if it was my birth control pill. I'd been on the generic form of this pill for 6 years at this point, with no issues. The last 3 months before my appointment, however, were not the same. My personality had changed too. I no longer felt like doing ANYTHING. I would come home and vegetate every single night and just feel... blah.

That's the only word to describe it. Two or three times a week after we ate dinner I'd be sick for the rest of the night. My doctor referred me to a gastroenterologist who checked nothing, no blood test, he didn't even touch my stomach to check for problems, and then he put me on this horrendously awful antibiotic to kill a "possible parasite from your honeymoon abroad". I questioned his judgment but dumbly followed his advice. This pill was in my system for 8 days. The first 5 days I was taking it I progressively got sicker and sicker until day 5. I was so stoned (I'm amazed I made it through any of those days at work), my whole body hurt and I was vomiting so badly that I almost drove myself to the ER. I quit taking it that night and laid in bed the next 3 days until it was out of my system. It took a week though before I stopped tasting metal in my mouth.

If a doctor ever prescribes you Metronizadole, tell him he's gotta be out of his effing mind!

I went to another doctor who wanted to give me the dreaded colonoscopy and endoscopy. My husband and I at this point were willing to do it until I found out it wasn't covered by insurance because I'm too young to need one. I was so sick of being miserable but something didn't feel right. I didn't think we needed to pay $2000 for me to have the procedure. So then we looked into diet changes, I stopped eating dairy completely for 3 weeks and started to improve. Right about this time though I started getting really hot and nauseated multiple times a day. I'd have to run to the bathroom wherever I was and put water on my face and try not to vomit. My skin would be hot to the touch on my arms, chest, neck and face. For anywhere from 2 minutes to 5 hours. I was having hot flashes!

I was really depressed and felt like I had become trapped in an old lady's body. I felt like a bad wife because I was never happy or energetic, and didn't want to do anything ever. I was messy, and miserable. One night I sat my husband down and discussed me quitting the birth control pill I was on. I had been on it for 7 years at this point and just wanted to cleanse my body of everything unnatural to it. I needed to see what life was like without it again, and get myself healthy. We aren't ready to have kids so we really didn't want me to go off it. I just knew, though, that it would be the right thing for me. So that night, I quit taking my pill. Three months later I have improved dramatically. Although I do have to say throughout the month following that day, I was a trainwreck. My emotions were all over the board, my body had no idea what to do with itself, I was exhausted, hormonal, mean, sick, and just plain batshit crazy.

But I felt happier inside. I felt my depression start to lift.

Funny thing though, my natural hormone production has gone haywire with all those years on the pill. I have teenage acne, my hair is greasy, but my body LOVES being away from those crazy hormones. Other fun perks, my husband says my breath smells better than it ever did. (Sorry for my contraceptive-caused halitosis this whole time!) I also feel like my brain is waking up to new goals, new hobbies, cleanliness, and happiness. I am so thankful I went with my gut. We really do know our bodies and can figure out what they need if we pay enough attention. I knew 6 months before I quit that pill that I needed to. I wish I had sooner.

For the record, I was taking Yaz and its generic derivative. I will never take that crap ever again. It is seriously messed up. I read forums after I quit about the insane side effects it causes in women. And not just the ones in the lawsuits.

It feels so good to be responsible for my health and in control of it once again. Now if I could just get my body to handle cheese again! I miss pizza. It's been almost a year since I could stomach it.

Baby steps...

Aren't we cute?

So I've been married to my husband for over a year now. By the time you read this it will be a few days past our actual anniversary. We are celebrating our anniversary later, where we'll be off on an adventure, so the day of our anniversary is just relaxing.

I am cooking ribs (for the first time ever!), corn on the cob, and some homemade french fries... the kind with potato skins on them. I'm super excited. I seem to always follow recipes quite well so this should be a breeze.

I would've posted this the day of our anniversary, but I already had the house pictures post up, and that took sooooo long to do, that I put this off until later. You see, my life gets busy so if I don't write a bunch of blog posts at one time, I may not get much of them done during the week. I'm one of those pre-blogger bloggers. Thank heavens for being able to schedule posts!

So here is a short list of what I've learned in our short year together:

1. A perfect day can go south because of a bad facial expression, or an accidental irritable tone of voice...because marriage is FUN & EASY ALL THE TIME!

2. We both know how to instantly forgive and forget to protect our sanity. You have to remember to do both parts, people. You can't just forgive and keep remembering. Marriage isn't about finding someone who will never hurt you ever. It's about forgiving them when they DO hurt you. We've both done things intentionally and unintentionally that caused the other a little pain. Just let it go, that's the only way to survive. We're all human.

3. Our cat is our child.

4. People ALWAYS want to know why we don't have kids or aren't making one yet. In fact, the pressure started when we were engaged. People told us if we didn't ask God when we should have them that we were not being good Mormon people. First off... never mind, I can't say it out loud on the internet. My answer is, it's none of your business, folks. When you see my Facebook feed fill up with pregnancy photos, then you'll be able to answer the question you should be keeping to yourself anyway. Besides, if you must ask, the question shouldn't be WHEN it should be 'Are you guys thinking about having children?' Then we'll answer, "yes". And then you can keep the WHEN to yourself, because again, it's none of your business. [End Rant]

5. Never compare your relationship to another. The same two people that are in yours, are not in theirs. It's a whole different ballgame. Your marriage may be football, theirs may be chinese checkers. Different game, different rules. 

6. Everyone starts the marriage off with the 3 month food/tv/cuddle fest binge. Then you realize, "Holy crap we are the laziest piles of garbage ever, let's start planning dates! Wait... I'm tired, movie night on the couch again?"

7. Buying a house together was a freakin' blast, and a freakin' challenge. Our peaks of excitement matched our valleys of fights.

8. Suddenly I'm willing to not control as much so that my husband is happier.

9. I need to learn to put my shoes away. Seriously. What IS my problem?

10. A clean house keeps both of us happier and more productive. He taught me that.

11. At the end of our first year, we're still in love, and definitely don't want to murder each other. I'd chalk it up to a majorly successful year! Wouldn't you?

So, a month and half later, here are pictures from our house! I find it only fitting that I post this on our 1 year anniversary of getting married!

We're quite a trio.

But!

Before I show you the pictures of our first home as homeowners, I thought I'd let you know the reason why my 1st year of marriage to Mr. Awesome has been the best experience of my life.

I never thought that my mom would get the cancer she has, or any cancer for that matter, but I don't think I could've carried on with life the way I did without him as my biggest support.  He spent many a hard night with me, cheering me up, and just making me feel loved. We didn't have an easy first year, but I wouldn't trade any of it for a second. I definitely love him more now than I did when we got married! It's crazy that it's been a year already, but I look forward to many more with him!



Now for the house pictures! We are still in the process of decorating and organizing a little bit so most of the walls are still bare. That just means I can buy cool art and fill up those bare walls!

Before

My in-laws came and helped us paint the rooms. They were an incredible help to us!