3:46 pm

It's 3:46 pm. I just spent the past 3 hours working on my essay on Amish families. I'm done now. I can't help but think that I'm so lucky. It wasn't anything the Amish paper made me think, it was just me and my thoughts. I sit in class and a lot of the time we talk about people's problems and how to handle them. I am a psych major, so I better learn! It makes me smile to realize that while yes I have had my share of crap to deal with, I am currently feeling like I'm the master of my own life. I know that God controls everything, but I am thankful he has blessed me with the things I want and need. I have so much to be grateful for as we approach Thanksgiving next week. I thought I'd give you readers of my blog my Thankful list. So here goes:

My mom. Without her I'd have driven everyone else in my life insane with how much I need advice or just a sounding board. She is my rock. And I don't know what I'll ever do without her. I'm so thankful she's here and available for me whenever I call her (which is A LOT!). I'm also grateful that she taught me to be smart and independent, instead of just teaching me to look pretty to get what I want. I love you mama! (I give you permission to stop aging now please!)

My stepdad Sam. He never gets to hear this, and I'm being a big fat chicken for writing it here, he probably never even looks at my blog, or knows I have one. I'm so thankful for him though. He married my mom, and treated her right. He also showed me what it's like to have a father that will be there, and what's even better is he does this even when you're not really his own flesh and blood. No matter how much I pushed against his acts of kindness, or acts of fatherhood, he still loves me. I know it, and I don't know if he realizes that I know this. Thank you and I love you Sam!

My 5 brothers, and 1 sister. To my bros, you guys are all funny. All of you. I love it!

• To Taylor for being a great oldest brother and telling me to invest in my retirement.

• To Bryce for trusting me enough to call me randomly and talk to me about life.

• To Cory for letting me call and vent about dumb boys.

• To Walker and Carson (the twins), for making me smile all through jr. high, and high school when I had to babysit you both. Favorite quote from Walker... You looked up at me like you had been contemplating for hours the mysteries of the world (I think you were 4), and you said "why are your teeth yellow and mine are white?" I couldn't help but love you for being so cute and funny! And Carson, you've always given me hugs, even after you got to the age where hugs were dumb. I miss hearing you call me "Naa", because you couldn't say "Lana". I still think of you two as the little 3 year olds with buzzed heads and fat bellies. I forget you're almost 13.
  

• And finally to Jade. My only sister. I love you, and I always wanted a sister so when we moved in with your dad I was so excited to have you! You're a great example of how NOT to be dramatic, and I always admired you for staying calm when I freak out about EVERYTHING. I'm sorry we don't keep in touch very well, I know that's mostly my fault.

I'm grateful for my friends. They're so funny, and so good to me. I've been blessed with many people I can talk to everyday if I want to. And I truly feel like they love me for the weird girl that I am.

Also a few other random things I'm thankful for...

• PTO from work. Without it I may have failed this semester but because I took advantage of it I MAY NOT!!
• Dayquil - so I could do my homework without falling asleep today.
• Grandma's homemade afghans. I have a couple, and I use them whenever I'm watching a movie or tv, and it reminds me of them everytime.
• The fact that currently I am able to get a really great hug after a really long day whenever I want it. And lately all my days are really long so I need those alot!